Ann's Abode

Dark thoughts arise



In the maze of games,

Should one play along?


Whims contradict Goals


Ambition leads...

Drama misleads...

Ambition makes you who you deserve to be,

Drama makes you forget who you were...


Paradigm shifts


Live, not act

Love, don't react...

I had a real scary dream this morning, got up at 4:30 am because of it and even considered practicing accounts, just because i didn't wanna go back to sleep!!!

The Dream
After college, the train that was supposed to take me to Vashi, changed direction sometime and took me to Wadala instead... I was perplexed, shocked and confused, was just thinking about calling mom when a child with very hollow eyes, of about 12, tapped me on my arm, he had my phone and said he was calling my mom... I woke up terrified.

I was just wondering what was it that scared me so much?

I was also thinking about what my college counselor told me... She said that i hold the reins too tight around me, that i don't let myself be and asked me to 'give space to myself'. What that basically means is that i scold myself a lot more than even my mom does, so that's a lot! :P

Anyway, i realised what the dream was about and why it scared me more than it would most people...

The train to Vashi going to Wadala instead was representative of the things out of my control affecting my life (i don't like it one bit!) The child having in possession, my cellphone was terrifying because it signified that i had lost control of what should normally be within my grasp.

Now, on hindsight, why wouldn't that be terrifying to a supposed 'control freak' like me! ... And you thought this was about the kid with the hollow eyes lol! ;)

Things are not always what you see them to be, there is always the prospect of deception, you tend to see things the way you want to and the way you believe to be true but not for what it really is. . .

If you see things for what they really are, then you see every being tormented by their demons, everyone appears fallible and vulnerable...

Well, almost everyone... there are always a chosen few who seem so unperturbed by circumstances, people or even by a frothy mixture of both.

These 'always-happy' people are the ones who see things the way they want to, only the way they believe to be true. . .

Then, there are the others who actually see through deceptions and can clearly see reality, but they have seen so much of it already that it doesn't trill them anymore, they see it all but are unaffected, they are NOT happy but 'NUMB'


So how does one get to that place where one isn't deceiving the self, hasn't become numb, but is truly happy...


...



By choosing to see the beauty in the world and in all,
By admiring their beauty and blessing them so their torments go away...
By loving every soul, helping and being there for them always...


Yes, I've found the secret to lasting happiness...

After the Obituary to my dear cellfone, I've bought a new one now...

I know i should be really thrilled that I've found an alternate someone

A twist of fate, a bad day, things going wrong, getting up n the wrong side of the bed... i don't believe in any of these things.

Hello der! How’s life treating ya? No, wait… correction….How are you treating life???

Did you know that the falling dream is actually an indication of you having lost control of some aspect of your daily life? One of my friends gets that dream repeatedly but she’s not gonna buy into this… very cynical babe that one…

And the Death dream actually symbolizes the death of worries in a person’s life! And indicates longevity and prosperity … had seen a very close friend in such a dream, was scared shitless and of course she did not fancy it either… yet

M brought a palmistry book yesterday, in which I saw that I have a psychic hand and have crosses in just the right place to make it as an occultist! Bring out the Crystal Ball already ;)

I saw Sex and the City - The Movie yesterday, was very excited to finally see it!